Featured

Calling on your “Shadow Team”

Posted on by principalmahoney

It’s the end of the year. Our “tanks” are empty.  As school leaders, we are running on fumes to survive physically, emotionally and organizationally. Each day feels like an uphill battle and one that we cannot possibly tackle. And yet, each morning we return for another day. 

How is it that we can be there for others to support and lift up, when we ourselves are running on empty?  First, we need to acknowledge that we simply aren’t the superheroes that we think we are. We simply CAN’T do it all.  We CAN’T solve every problem.  We CAN’T put out every fire.  We CAN’T handle every issue.  Then, we need to think about who we have on our teams or extended teams that can be on our shadow team and can stand by us for support. 

Members of your shadow team could be your AP or your counselor – there by your side to make a difficult call to a parent or help craft an email.  Your shadow team could be your same level administrator colleagues in the district who know exactly what your days are like. Your shadow team could be a Supervisor in the district who you reach out to when you need help with substitute coverage.  Your shadow team could be someone in the Central Office who can partner with you to solve a problem, have a conversation or even just listen to you on a challenging day (maybe they’ll even bring you lunch or coffee). 

But here’s the thing about your shadow team, they’ve got you… but you have to ASK.  And we, as heart-y leaders, aren’t good about asking. We aren’t good about saying that we are not superheroes. We aren’t good at admitting that we are out of gas or that things are hard.  But, if you do, and you reach out to someone on your shadow team, I guarantee that they’ll show up and you’ll be filling both your tank and theirs just a little bit at the same time.  As we roll into the end of the year, our shadow teams are more important than ever.  Just reach out and tap them in. 

Featured

Passion over Pandemic

Posted on by principalmahoney

Passion Over Pandemic (Jodi Mahoney)

Can you feel it? The power of the pandemic pushing the passion right out of you? It’s happening. The pandemic mandates logistical adjustments daily, making the work of leadership more planning than passion on most days. But, you can find time – each day or at least each week, to choose passion over pandemic.

I tweeted today, “As a school Principal, it is my privilege and pleasure to always be a teacher first. Each fall, I schedule myself to share my writer’s notebook with Grades 3-5. I always write them a new poem to inspire their writing.…” @jodi_mahoney (10/12/20) Writing is my thing. I love to share my craft with young writers, show them my writer’s notebook, explain my craft and write for them as an audience. This brings me joy! And therefore, I squeeze in my 15-20 minute presentation over the course of a few weeks to get into these classrooms (even virtually).  

For my students in K-2, I always do a read aloud for them.  This year’s read aloud, I Believe I Can by Grace Beyers – a beautifully diverse book with a powerful message.  And the joy that reading this book brings to me and to the students – not to mention the respite (albeit very short) of planning and teaching that it allows for their teachers while I read is the gift that I can offer. It fuels my day and offers moments of passion over pandemic.

In the craziness of Pandemic logistics, you MUST find ways to CARVE out your passion for teaching, education, and fostering relationships.  This is the work that brought us into the world of education and this is the work that will save us from the pandemic protocols that our leadership world has become.  

I challenge you – how will you put your passions over the pandemic?

Featured

This is HARD WORK…

Posted on by bonniecapes

This is hard work, people!! As I come close to end of my 7th year as a Principal, I can’t help but say, this is hard flipping work!  Even now, with 7 years of experience as a Principal (not including AP/Central Office leadership), it doesn’t get any easier. Plain and simple, this is HARD!

The rise in social media and capturing the “highlight reels of life” can leave one feeling super depressed. I equate this to being a mom. I scan through post after post of amazing parents doing amazing things with their kids. Meanwhile, I’m not sure if mine ate last night because I was at school making sure the sports parents didn’t play bumper cars or hit any kids during late dismissal, I made sure to call back a few unhappy parents, and then I rushed to a board meeting that went on forever. I came home to two sleeping kids, a grumpy mother who I swear is judging me as a terrible mother (yes, my mom lives with me…more about that in another post), and a husband who…well, he didn’t ask for any of this and he spends what is left of the night re-writing the stories of the motherhood failures I’ve concocted in my head. (He is literally a saint and the center of another blog post coming soon!). Unlike Instagram, I did not make unicorn cupcakes and sing sweet songs until my children fell asleep, while making sure every last detail for the next day of school was settled. However, I still manage to post my own “highlight reel” of the good stuff happening…well, when it happens…well, if it happens! Yet, this is just a snapshot of what I want you to see.

Nonetheless, I still fall victim to believing that I’m the only one who fails or has rough days. I still feel like I am the only one who feels like this job is STILL super-duper hard.  Yet, one person doesn’t fail me and never ceases to make me laugh. When I’m looking at all the amazing posts and I’m having a “what the heck am I doing” moment, I can typically swipe to a post by the only “for real” person I know, one of my best friends, Jen. She posts the realities of being a working mom, having a three year old write all over her walls, and an eight year old storming away because it is time for bed and he must get out of his football uniform. My favorites are when she posts her “REAL” comments Instagram.

Posted underneath a beautiful family photo of Jen, her husband, and their two children, outside of a movie theater:  “Slo was excited to see her first movie; and once we got there she was so much more excited to see the bathrooms and run around in the hallway.  #shitshow #wetried”

But, let’s face it…the same happens in our professional world. We post the good, the amazing, and the epic. It’s never the good, the bad, and the ugly.Nobody posts the bad stuff, right? For us, as school leaders, we simply cannot even begin to share the “not so pretty days” because of confidentiality, etc… However, the reality is that WE ALL HAVE BAD DAYS! There are times when you want to drive away and never return. There are times when you are just waiting for the Superintendent to call and let you have it for something you never even saw coming. There are times when you work on a project that is designed to give kids a great opportunity and a student says, “I hate this!” There are times when you wonder if your staff hates you. The list can literally keep going and going and going.

So, why do we all pretend? Why do we say everything is amazing, when you may be moments away from tears? Why do we not reach out to each other more and say, “Today was hard!”  Another great colleague of mine and co-author of this blog (love you, Jodi!) makes me laugh when she shares a text that ends with #iquitagaintoday. Again, I am not sure we embrace each other enough because we, as the leaders, must keep a positive outlook and sense of strength.  

I am not saying that I do not like my work.  For me, I know that I have truly found my calling. Being in a school and working on behalf of children to give them a voice is the most amazing job in the world…regardless of your title!! I have truly found my purpose and while in one moment it can be hard, the next could be welcomed by a hug, a thank you, a smile. That’s all it takes. My heart is instantly filled. For every negative moment, there are multiple positives right around the corner. However, in the words of Dave Burgess responding to his least favorite six words on planet earth (Don’t ever say these six words to Dave: It’s easy for you, you’re creative!), “If it were easy, everyone would do it!” It isn’t EASY worrying about 20, 200, 1100, or 2700 kids every day and night. It isn’t EASY when a student is considering ending his/her life because they don’t feel like they belong. It isn’t EASY when you see a student with bruises that were caused by someone who is supposed to unconditionally love them. It isn’t EASY when a former student who moved to a neighboring town contacts you to say he hasn’t attended school for over a month and that he misses you and your school terribly.  It isn’t EASY when you do not recommend someone for another year’s contract even though you know it’s the only choice. It isn’t EASY when a staff member comes into your office to share with you that they may have cancer and will need to have emergency surgery. It isn’t EASY giving feedback to a staff member who does not buy-in to your leadership style…yet. It isn’t EASY when a student emails you at 12:00am letting you know that she got jumped in a fight and wants you to come to her house to talk, because you are the only one she trusts. It isn’t EASY when colleagues criticize a project your are starting because they aren’t a PIRATE and she thinks it is just a gimmick. It isn’t EASY. None of it is.

My point is this: let’s be there for each other. Do not stop posting wonderful moments.  They are the inspiration some of us need. However, let’s remember that with every amazing post by our friends/colleagues there are many, many tough days and moments that have allowed them to celebrate this special time. And… do not ever forget that this is HARD work, but it is also “HEART” work!

Float

Posted on by bonniecapes

FLOAT – B. Capes-Flanders

The water is deep and your feet are far from the ocean floor.  

The ocean is angry.  

Here you are, treading water.

Out in this storm.

The waves keep coming, coming and coming.  

Some are small;

easy to bounce through.  

Others are large and cover your head and for a moment, you struggle to breathe.

You keep treading water.  

You are so strong.

You just keep going.  

However,

I can see it.  

I know it. 

I feel it.  

You 

are 

tired.  

YOU NEED TO REST.

I wish I could toss you a life preserver or tell you that the rescue boat is moments away.  

YOU NEED TO REST.

The reality is that the life preserver isn’t here, yet.

YOU NEED TO REST.

The rescue boat is a distance away.  

It is still so tiny on the horizon.  

YOU NEED TO REST.

There is more water to tread, so please;

please…

Take time to…      F              O                T. 

                                    L                 A

Lay back, look up, and let yourself…      f                      t. 

                                                                         l           a

                                                                               o

For a minute, an hour, a night, a weekend.  Even the strongest among us NEED to take a moment to just…

                                                                                                                                                                                                            float. 

Show your Appreciation: Because it’s Right Guest Blogger, Peter Rattien

Posted on by bonniecapes

Throughout the course of a school year, staff members do such amazing work. I’ve seen staff members pull a student aside during their lunch hour to build up self-esteem. Others have sat with new colleagues well after dismissal to share knowledge and lesson plans. And I have seen a staff member dig out and create a sand pit with students who wanted just this for recess. Now, these actions may not surprise you. If you work in a school, you likely witness such acts on a regular basis. The question is, what do we do when we see such amazing contributions to our school community?

It’s our job, as leaders, to show true appreciation for these efforts. While these staff members don’t do it for the recognition, don’t we all crave the human acknowledgment of what we do (especially when it’s so genuine)?  Think about how you feel when your supervisor/boss acknowledges the work you have done.

Ok, ok. By now, you may be saying, I acknowledge staff members when I see them doing something positive for our school community. If so, you’re clearly a “Heart-y” and caring leader. There’s no doubt. So, I share with you that I would have been saying the same thing a little while back. But now, after connecting with other amazing leaders in person, via twitter, and through books, I’ve added to my repertoire.

Consider one teacher who has single handedly spearheaded a family fun learning evening event for over 300 people. For months, she spends many hours after school, preparing for this event. From soliciting teachers, to running planning meetings, to ordering supplies, she makes sure the event runs without a hitch. Regardless of the final product, which is an amazing event where students and families come play a variety of games that are academically embedded, this staff member spends many hours away from her family to prepare and make this happen. A pat on the back or even the most sincere thank you just wasn’t enough. Then, I read the book, Creating Magic: 10 Common Sense Leadership Strategies from a Life at Disney, by Lee Cockerell. I was inspired by some of the ideas in the book and used a modified one for this staff member. I wrote a letter to the family of this staff member, including a gift card to a local ice cream shop where she lived and sent it with an actual stamp through the mail! Here’s the letter: see attached

These types of gestures can help build a positive culture and climate for a school. You roll a snack cart around the building to each staff member, give out a free period slip, or write a letter like this to a family. There are many other ideas in the book I noted, as there are in many other books. So, have fun it with. When staff members are appreciated for their efforts, it can help them further enjoy coming to work. Just imagine if your staff is just a little bit happier, what might happen to the students? Most importantly, it’s just the right thing to do. Isn’t it?

Peter Rattien, Principal of Indian Fields

Crazy Thankful

Posted on by principalmahoney

by Jodi Mahoney

For those who know me and work with me, they know that I wear my heart on my sleeve. They also know that I often send out poems when the moment strikes.  I use my poetry to tell my staff that I appreciate them, to know that they are not alone and to honor and validate the hard work that encompasses being an educator.  

My poem ideas come to me quickly and I usually write them quickly and send them out soon thereafter.  It is always a vulnerable moment for me. Is the poem any good? Will the sentiment resonate? Will it come across as authentic or cheezy?  I hope that it resonates. I hope that it feels authentic. I hope that it fills their bucket.

And often, after sending it out, I’ll get personal e-mails back, telling me that they “loved the poem,” or “thank you for sharing,” or “That sums it up!” and immediately my bucket is filled too.  I don’t write them for that purpose. I don’t send them expecting accolades to be sent back, but they come. And you know what, they fill my bucket. The help me to know that when I model vulnerability, they can too.  When I honor that this is hard work, they know that my support is authentic. And so, when the moment strikes, the poems are written.

Crazy Thankful

By Jodi Mahoney

Nov. 27, 2019

Teaching makes you crazy thankful.
 
Crazy thankful
For the sleepless nights
               Worrying about how to reach kids who struggle
               Conjuring up ideas about lesson plans
               Orchestrating schedules
For the collaboration
               Teaming with colleagues
               Sharing resources
               Tweeting with PLCs
For the students who enter our lives
               Fist bump us each day
               Smile with every “AHA!”
               And who challenge us to be empathetic
For the colleagues who bolster our spirits
               Boost our self-confidence
               Share our frustrations
               Foster our dreams
               Empower our next idea
This job is crazy.
 
But every day
We are crazy thankful
That we get to work with
Amazing people
And help them believe in their dreams.
 
Thanks for being crazy with me!
I’m crazy thankful for you!

FOBFO

Posted on by bonniecapes

Many of you have heard about the popular term FOMO, which stands for the Fear of Missing Out.  Our kids are certainly plagued with this very idea day in and day out, especially with the influx of daily updates on social media.  As adults, we certainly feel FOMO in our own lives. However, each time I hear FOMO, I think to myself, “There is something else that I fear more.”  

Thus, I would like to introduce the term FOBFO!  For so many educators, this fear is pervasive and can destroy your self-esteem, confidence, and the important impact we all have in the lives of kids.  So, what does FOBFO stand for? The Fear of Being Found Out!  

We have all been in the place of giving wonderful advice, “No one is perfect!”  “We are all in the process of learning and growing.” “Fail Forward!” However, how many of you are found paralyzed and afraid that someday, someone will find out that you don’t have it all together?  They’ll find out that you struggle to balance work and home. They’ll find out that you do not have the expertise in every content area. They’ll find out…(You fill in the blank!)  

I recently talked about the term FOBFO with a group of moms.  They said, “Oh my goodness, YES!!” I told them, as a Principal, I often worry that people will find out that I struggle with my own kids, even though they entrust me with theirs. I struggle getting my son to balance life and gaming.  This past year, I was so overwhelmed that I almost forgot my daughter’s birthday! (I said almost!) One mom shared that she was embarrassed to share that she and her son did not cry while dropping him off at college for the first time.    The other moms said, “No! Don’t be ashamed. That means you gave him all the skills to be confident and happy in this new venture.” I was so proud to hear how this small group of moms gathered around and lifted each other.  

So, how do we combat FOBFO?  

Step 1:  Own it and #TellYourStory!

Sharing your story of your own “human” side helps to make everyone realize that we are not alone.  Share your truths and know that we are all great at something, not expected to be great at everything.

Step 2:  Take a deep breath!

When you see that so many others are in the same boat, take a deep breath.  Realize that we are all doing our very best and that, in and of itself, is AWESOME!

Step 3:  Keep a “Happiness Folder” and Peek In!

There is no doubt that if you work with kids, you have had moments where they have provided wonderful little gems of happiness.  Whether it is a morning hug, a little card, a high five in the hallway, or an email thanking you for making a difference, there is always something that reminds you of our “WHY” for this incredible work.  SAVE these moments in a “Happiness Folder” and tuck it away. When you are in the struggles of FOBFO, take a moment to open that folder and smile. You deserve it!

Step 4:  Reach out!

We all have our personal and professional lifesavers.  For me, it’s my awesome husband and some of my colleagues like Jodi!  I also have my Twitter inspirations like Todd Nesloney or Adam Dovico – who have more energy than the energizer bunny and they thrive on celebrating EVERYONE!  Find those people. Share. LISTEN to their positivity.  

(Jodi and I are always here, too, and we would LOVE to connect! Reach out to us!)

Step 5:  Keep going and keep sharing the UNIQUE YOU with the world!

Don’t stop and don’t give up!  Keep sharing who you are with the world.  You may need a change of scenery or a new opportunity to re-energize your passion.  But, do not change who you are. This world needs you! We need you! And, that is worth finding out!

Share your own experiences with #FOBFO

Opening days and Heart-y Messages

Posted on by principalmahoney

Jodi Mahoney

It’s Labor Day Weekend and the summer has slipped away. If you’re like me, you’re probably feeling like the summer flew by and you haven’t accomplished very much – even though you worked – a lot. You worked a lot. 

Most non-educators don’t get that summer is still a lot of work – they ask, do you work all summer? And, they are genuinely surprised when the answer is, “YES.”  And then they ask, “Well, what do you DO all summer?” And I have to think how to explain the DAYS that it took to hire a new teacher – interviews, reference checks, paperwork, etc. I explain meetings and professional development and trainings and schedules.  And it all seems pretty easy to digest.  

What is harder to explain, is how it takes all summer to plan two, yes TWO, meaningful and heart-y days of professional meetings for teachers.  You see, this, this work of officially welcoming back teachers after Labor Day isn’t just the same meeting every year.  No, it’s one that marinates over the summer. It is informed by my philosophy, by my staff’s needs, by my district’s initiatives, by my school goals, by time parameters, by inspiration, by motivation and by relevance to my staff and their ultimate ability to take my words and actions and embed them in the work they will do with students in the months to come. 

And sometimes, my opening days are really just one, one 1½ hour meeting with me staff.  That’s it. The rest of the opening days are the “stuff” that they need to get ready for students.

So in that one 1 ½ hour meeting, I must make it meaningful and relevant.  It must be purposeful and thoughtful. It must not be a waste of their time.  This is how I come to plan each and every staff meeting that I hold throughout the year – is this a good use of their time? Is this something that will help them back in the classroom?  If not, perhaps it’s better communicated in my weekly newsletter. 

My opening day meetings are meant to be personal, inspiring and fun.  As I plan for them, I consider the following (in addition to those aforementioned thoughts):

  1. How will I welcome my staff and honor our “family” milestones and celebrations that have happened since we last met in June? (Birthdays, Weddings, sending children to college, vacations, tenure, etc.)
  2. What message do I want my staff to carry with them this year (teamwork, positivity, telling your story, being a changemaker, etc.)?
  3. What team-building fun opportunities can I embed in my meetings that can also be used with students (if the staff wishes to do so)?

And that’s it. I’ve learned to protect my opening day message and sentiments and clear it of mandates, emergency procedures and evaluation jargon. (Thanks to my Superintendent, Scott Feder, who observed my opening day meeting a few years ago and told me to do just that. And I did. And I’m so glad I did.)

You see, your opening day is your time to protect your message, share your heart and help your teachers find their school-soul.  

Your mandates, evaluation memos and emergency drill responses can be saved for another day.  But your message cannot wait. Leaders who put their message first open their hearts to their staff and allow for them to breathe in the message and be inspired.  It allows the staff to drink in the celebratory nature of being together as a school family again and basking in the joy of the promise of a new school year. 

If you are reading this and have planned your opening days… I wish you the best of luck.  If you’ve already delivered your opening days… were you able to protect your message and leave out the other junk? If not, maybe next year.  And, if you still aren’t planned, I hope I’ve inspired you to think about your heart-y message for your opening moments with staff. It’s one shot you’ve got on opening day.  Make it a heartfelt one.

Heart-y leaders aren’t always strong…

Posted on by bonniecapes

I have been crafting this blog post in my mind for several months and each time I have stopped.  Is it appropriate? Should I be talking about this? Should I even bring to light this hidden part of my life?  It is actually the reason I have been silent for a little bit. It was hard to think about posting something thoughtful or reflective when I had this other “thing” that was consuming my life.  However, I believe strongly in the power of messages.  I am struggling right now and the messages I keep seeing are both Todd Nesloney’s hashtag and movement, #TellYourStory, and, just recently seeing Brene Brown’s quote, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through the process is the greatest thing we will ever do.”  While part of my life is starting to gear up for the stress and anxiety of a new school year, my other part is trying to figure out how to process what is about to happen.  Heart-y leaders take risks and heart-y leaders can be vulnerable by sharing and owning their stories. So, here goes…

Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.  I am not ready for tomorrow. These are the conflicting feelings coursing through my mind, body, and soul as I write this post.  The past 4 ½ years have been waiting for this moment. 4 ½ years of struggle, tears, embarrassment, judgment, hatred, pain, anger, forgiveness, and every emotion in between.  4 ½ years ago I watched my father leave a courtroom in handcuffs. And, tomorrow, he gets to come home for a furlough day…for the first time in 4 ½ years.  

So much has happened in the last 4 ½ years…we (my mother and I + my two children) faced ugliness from the outside, ugliness from those close to us, and perhaps the hardest to handle was the ugliness from ourselves struggling to make sense of a horrible mistake by someone we loved.  My kids have grown without Grandpa there to cheer them on. My own marriage fell apart (in part due to this) and I struggled to even believe or love myself. I helped my mother pack up and sell my childhood home for her to come and live with me in my rented townhouse basement. We spent almost every single weekend in the “prison system” to visit my dad because you don’t turn your back on family.  We prayed, we wept. There were good things, too. I found a wonderful man, who never once judged me and accepted my broken family and hidden secret, and loved me even more. My son learned how to ride a bike. My daughter performed numerous shows as the lead actress. My mother kept on teaching. I got re-married. All without my dad there.  

Now, here I sit.  Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.  I am not ready for tomorrow. My dad will be coming home for a few hours (under strict regulations).  But, this isn’t the home he left. We do not have his bed. We do not even have his clothes. Everything had to go…it was all lost.  There are none of the things he spent years collecting and hanging on the walls to make his “home”. This is my home, the one we have created over the past 4 ½ years.  But, it’s also the one we struggled to create out of tragedy and the one that he cannot even picture in his mind. There is not enough time to make it perfect. Yes, we bought him a new chair (doesn’t every dad have a “chair”?) so he can finally put his feet up.  Yes, we have bought all the food for his favorite home-cooked meals. Something he hasn’t had for 4 ½ years. Yes, we have signs from the kids welcoming “Gramps” home. Yes, my son even has an activity itinerary that includes mostly Gramps watching him create Minecraft.  

Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.  4 ½ years ago, I started planning for May 6th, 2020…his official release date.  I have dreamt about the day that my dad could see the life we created. The day that he would see that my mom and I survived.  The day that he would realize that he raised an incredibly tough and strong girl. The day that he would be able to be part of our family again.  The day he could be “normal” again and have a small sense of human dignity. The day he could come back and be both Dad and Grandpa again. The day he would finally come home.  His first furlough day is tomorrow. I am not ready for tomorrow. I am scared and I do not want him to be disappointed. He has had 4 ½ years of disappointment. I don’t want to let him down.  I want everything to be perfect. Good people make bad decisions and no matter what, he is my dad.  

There is another reality that is in the back of my mind.  Am I going to be able to handle it? 4 ½ years ago, I was an emotional wreck.  Life as I knew it, was turned upside down for myself and everyone around me. But, I learned how to stuff it down, to hide this part of my life, and to move on like everything was fine.  Yet, now, on the eve of this monumental day, all of it comes flooding back. My strength is missing and I am scared. We have carved out a new “normal” and new life. How will he fit in?  Here I am, once again, an emotional wreck.

As I worry about all of the details and struggle through this emotionally challenging day, there are a few things that I hope my story will serve as a reminder of:

  1. There is no going back, only forward.  Tomorrow is the start of yet another new “normal”. 
  2. Perfect doesn’t exist.  Perfect is enjoying the imperfections and remembering that people, not things, are what should be loved.
  3. It’s the little things.  Out of all this preparation, we kept asking my dad what he wanted to make this day special.  His answer: I just want to be able to take a shower in a clean bathroom by myself.
  4. Forgiveness is hard, but also beautiful.
  5. You are strong enough to handle anything…even when you are weak.
  6. Sharing your story helps to build strength.
  7. There is always a little joy, even in the darkest of times. 

There are so many, many, many mini-stories that this experience has given me.  So many moments that I have wanted to share as part of my double life – loving someone on the inside while living on the outside.  And, all of these stories, all of these moments, have made me a stronger and more “heart-y” leader. To my fellow leaders, lead with your heart by telling your story and listening to the stories of others without judgment.   You just never know what someone may be going through.  

Now…t’s time for me to go and finish our preparations for the big day.  Tomorrow can’t come soon enough!

Lead with Your Heart, and Let That Heart be Kind

Posted on by bonniecapes

GUEST BLOG POST BY…Blair Eiseman @BlairEiseman

When I hear the phrase, “Lead with your heart,” my first thought is always, “Is there any other way?” But then I quickly remember that we all operate differently. We have varying degrees of heart and different personalities and circumstances. We have different abilities to give, care and love, and that can stem from a whole list of reasons: experiences, upbringing, environment, background…

So, what do you do when your colleagues or teammates have a different level of heart? Simple…show yours.  

  • Try to get to know your colleagues. We all have a story, and when we know even a piece or a chapter, we can better understand each other’s reasoning, thoughts and actions.  
  • Take the high road. Be the bigger person.
  • Never assume, but if you do, assume people’s intentions are pure.
  • Admit fault. Show that you are human.
  • Don’t take things personal. (This is a hard one!)
  • Find the best in people. Do not focus on the negative. There is something wonderful to be found in everyone.
  • Communicate – to avoid misunderstandings, to make people feel valued, to give needed information, to just check in on someone.
  • LISTEN. Really listen. Not to respond, but to understand.
  • No kind gesture is too small – do one, daily. I bet the kindness will spread.
  • Make time for others. Yes, all of our plates are overflowing and cracking under pressure, but if someone needs you, be what they need. We would want the same.
  • Admit your insecurities and then leave them at home. They make things messy. Remember: others have them, too.
  • If you are going to believe in something or someone, believe ALL the way.  
  • Lift people up, even if they haven’t had a kind heart towards you. I used to tell my students that they didn’t have to be friends or even like each other, but they did have to show respect at all times. You do not have to like someone to be kind. The same goes for us adults.

Regardless of your position in education, you are part of a team, a bigger picture. Nothing you are doing, none of your work, is about you. We are not competing with one another to see who is the better teacher or leader. Rather, we are on the same side of the field.

When you’re running for the end zone, I’m cheering you on. If you fall, I’ll help you up. If you’re tired, tag me in. Towel, water…whatever you need, I’m here for it. That’s what teammates do. So, yes, lead with your heart, and let that heart be kind. Relationships matter, always, and a kind heart is always full.